"It’s so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it’s not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it…. In our hands."
I can’t count on all my fingers and toes how many times I’ve had conversation about relationships or the lack thereof. Conversations on why dudes are so lame? Where are all the good guys? Why my gorgeous, intelligent, hilarious friends are still single (no, I will not expose your names either) lol? And at the end of every conversation, I must admit the dudes get blamed. Either there aren’t any good ones left, or their not financially responsible, or they’re just an urban myth. There are no GOOD GUYS period. I just wanted to go on the record as saying that I believe there are. I believe there are fabulous brothers out there but for you to find a GOOD GUY, you need to be a GOOD GIRL. It doesn’t make sense to want a dude who has his ish together if you’re all over the place. A dude who wants to get married if YOU have commitment issues. It boggles my mind why females would even entertain the thought of being with a dude they could change. Why would you want to be with a man who is unable to stand up for himself and just be. If he can’t stand up to you, he’ll never stand up for you.
Forcing you to ask the question, as to wither or not you are a reflection of what you seek.If you want a good guy, you have to be a good girl.
Your probably wondering why MZY-Unleashed exists; simple, I want it too. This is a place where I will vent, share writings, plan my seductions (yes, I’m going to seduce someone or rather attempt to), and most importantly be. This is for me, my little place in the cyber-world where I can be; whoever that is. Considering that this is my third post, I guess I’m a little too late with the intro. But here goes anyways. I’m a 23 year student of life, although I do go to an accredited university I’ve found that you only learn through living.
So this is my trials, tribulations and success.
“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present.” Anais Nin
Change is inevitable. I can’t prevent it from happening, I can only learn to embrace it and flow with the coming tide. I am not who I was yesterday nor am I half of who I will be tomarrow. I can only embrace the current day and stop reliving the mistakes of my past, unless they are being used to strengthen my future. Every day brings new pains, loves, struggles and accomplishments. We have to learn to take the good with the bad. For it is the bad that truly determines us as individuals. We all have obstacles in life, we’ve each had our own sob stories or trials that nearly crippled us. However we can’t all say that we’ve used these situations to our advantages. Some of us choose to wallow in our self-pity and curse everyone around them accept the real reason for their current state; themselves. I’m not here to front like everything in my life is great, because it certainly isn’t. But I had a very interesting conversation with a friend recently and its helped me refocus my life. Shit happens, you just need to get over it. I always felt that I only had two options in life, I could either cry about it or get over it. I’ve found that sometimes I need to cry before I can get over it. Something issues need a proper burial, or they’ll only find themselves making a comeback in later years or later struggles.
Change is recognizing that people around you grow. You have to allow them to, even if it distances you from these very same people. I’ve had friends who I expected to have around forever, and now only 4 years down the line we’ve already gone our seperate ways. Some of these friendships ended painfully and some just slowly drifted. I love all of them for helping me become the person that I’ve become, because each friendship has contributed something to my mental and physical growth, they were food for my mind. We have to nurture and allow those around us to grow, for it is in their growth that we grow as well. Wanting the best for my ”sister” not only allows me to become a better Muslim but it puts me in the way of positive energy. I’ve had moments where holding on to what was, was more important to me than letting them grow. I learned the hard way, that what will be will be with or without my help.
An ugly boy broke my heart. Or at least that’s what my friend called him I just thought he had a great personality. Which is obviously why we started even talking to begin with and somewhere along the line he tricked me. I’m ignoring his call one day and the next I’m patiently waiting by the phone. Ok, I lied I’m angrily waiting for his call. One day I’m laughing on top and the next I’m at the bottom wondering why the hell I’m sitting on the ground. Again, I was tricked. Ugly boy’s are good at that. I’d liken them to magicians one minute their sweet, charming, and hilarious.. POOOF, the next they’re gone. Not evil, mean or rude.. Just gone. Why do ugly boy’s disappear, if your were so gung ho on getting into my life what’s the point of running away. I think you should’ve figured out what the hell you wanted before you decided to “Holla”.. Why are people even “Hollering” anymore anyway. Well anyways back to my point, this ugly boy broke my heart not because I loved him but rather because he caught me slipping. Actually let me just be honest, he forced me to question my self-worth, if he doesn’t want me who the hell will. Mind you he’s not ugly physically, ok I boosted he is.